2012…. Don’t be afraid to ask WHY!

2012.... Don't be afraid to ask WHY! Why do we exist?

2012…. Don’t be afraid to ask WHY!

From the black Eames chair that I have sat in as a therapist for well over 10,000 hours, 2012 parades forth as the catalyst humans need to jar them from their slumber.  Blessings to the Mayans for their implantation of an alarm bell into the future collective consciousness of humanity.

Whether they have predicted the end of times, the beginning of a new spiritual era or nothing at all, we should not delay the existential question most everyone avoids in order to focus on thoughts that keep their self-concept and lives in tact.  Now, let’s ask:

Why do you exist?

Unfortunately for my hapless parents and tolerant friends, I have asked myself this question dozens of times a day from far (far) too young an age.  I ask this question of others for a living and when bored at social gatherings to receive countless blank stares accompanied by the white noise emitted from their overloaded machinery.

The majority’s momentum requires you not ask this basic question.  Life, like molasses, tastes dense and yummy, sucks you in and dumps you into a sugar coma.  Satiated with daily routine and dramatic life turns that we blame on others, life drips by drop by drop.

Why do you exist?

It’s not a scary question, yet 99.9% of humanity waits until they’re ill, on their deathbed or not even then to wonder what we’re doing here. Ask when you’re young, lucid, in good health, still have choices, before you procreate, marry and divorce.

This year, the Mayans dare us to consider the purpose of our existence before it’s too late. We may never know whether their assertion/prediction/invitation is real or not. Yet, we can use it as a tool to recover the inquiry that remains buried under the debris of our lives, beating a rhythm deep in our hearts.  Even as we run from errand to errand, job to home, job at home, laundry, market, dishes, Monday to Friday and Sunday night, again too soon, it’s within us awaiting our attention.

No one wants us to ask.   The world is against it, because the “Why?” contradicts society’s celebrated accomplishments and journeys. Measure, know and scour the material and anti-material energy that comprises everything outside of you to define you, others and your life’s value.

Revered as one of the greatest minds of our time, Steven Hawking’s work wholly concerns itself with the measurement and definition of the endless, unknowable outermost-reaches of the external world.  No human will ever be able to confirm his life’s work.

NASA and its Kepler telescope seek to locate habitable, Earth-like planets.  They’ve discovered numerous, though none of us will ever visit any of them.  Millions of dollars and endless Earth resources spent searching for nothing knowable and incomprehensible to most. Despite my best efforts, I cannot fathom its relevance to any moment of my life.

Our only certainty lives alone, enclosed within our minds, through our perceptions, memories, hopes and moments. Yet we hold our certain truth against the structure and rules that we instructed are real, what society exalts, what we can define and measure.

We stay imprisoned for fear of ridicule and the potential destruction of our relationships and the lives we know.  We live as if a single phone call or a moment in time will not provide the definitive push needed to consider the reason for our existence.

As I write this, my beloved friend approaches death in hospice annoyed that her friends and family are making her transition about themselves. Goodbyes said last week, her room filled with ipads and twitter tweets. She says nothing because she still doesn’t want to upset anyone.  Who cares? They are upset and will be upset any way.

It doesn’t have to be that dramatic if you start today.  Telling yourself that what you do, who you marry, what others think of you defines you or your existence creates a life filled with anxiety, fear and a primal terror.

Countless times I asked friends and clients to strip down what they fear most and have heard:

“People finding out.”

“Finding out what?”

“That I’m not who they think I am.”

Why are we taught to care what others think of us? The prison of societal expectation, real or fabricated, becomes a dangerous shelter in our life, on our way to death.

Solar flares illuminate the atmosphere and reveal the Northern Lights. Under their brightness, take a moment and allow yourself to wonder why you exist in this form, your specific body, with your talents, at this time, where you live. Why?

Dump the Western Psychotherapeutic inquiry of “Who are you?” for “Why are you here, as you, right now?”  The latter inquiry subsumes the former and gives it intention and purpose.

Why we exist includes an other, whether a person, a cause, a purpose that pushes us forward in our development.  It doesn’t need to earn you an Oscar, a spot in the NBA or a billion dollars.  If you feel compelled to love the 100 year-old oak tree outside your house, then exist for that tree.

There is no wrong answer.

No one needs to know.  It can be your secret inquiry.  Too much of mass culture has mocked the question and killed it before its birth.  Humans evolved to need another’s enthusiastic waves of proverbial pompons to ratify action or thought.  We don’t need it.  Ask what brings you your specific joy and, in time, acting upon it will provide comfort and celebration.

My inquiry led me to what lies in the depth, if not the breadth, of this life.  For me, the action which resulted is to give good love.  A consistent, open, humorous and real support that allows others to flourish and live more out loud and less alone in this ever-expanding universe than without my presence.  I exist to love and believe all of us do.

Love that tree, your neighbor, your garden, lost cats, singing, your children, the Dali Lama, baking, Jesus Christ, travel, Bill Maher, little league baseball, cashmere sweaters or medical research.  It doesn’t matter, if you grow from it.

Last Sunday, seven hours of playoff football on television was the best way I knew how to love myself, which allowed me to love others the next day.

Stay focused on the question. 

After you ask and ask, time no longer speeds passed you.  Monday feels like a week, filled with ebbs, flows, joy, stillness, stress, anger and nothing.  All in one day.  No one wants to live a life they don’t remember living.

Dare yourself to ask the question often.  Don’t require action. Your inquiry will lead you step by step.

Somehow the action or the “do” finds you if you stick to the question, give yourself time to answer and accept the answer.  The action doesn’t have to be vast, glamorous or even profitable.  I doubt we get points over there for any of that. We’re created in these individual bodies to discover what lies within, not outside of it.

 

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Mala Mukherji – About the Author:

 

Bio of Mala Mukherji

Born in Los Angeles, California to parents, who immigrated from Calcutta, India, Mala Mukherji began studying the differences between Indian and American cultures from an early age.  Frequent and early trips to India and being raised in Covina, a homogeneous suburb of Los Angeles created the perfect climate for Mala’s future pursuits.

While attending the University of California at Los Angeles, she studied the psychological and sociological impacts of the politics and histories of numerous cultures.  After receiving her degree from U.C.L.A., she attended Pepperdine University School of Law, where she concentrated on issues relating to individual rights.  After passing the California State Bar Examination, Mala practiced law in the Los Angeles area for over eight years.

Throughout her law career, Mala studied and explored Western psychological theory and Eastern philosophy and their practical application to the individual’s experiences.  As a result of those studies, Mala left law practice and created a modality of spiritual psychological therapy, which combines Eastern and Western theory.  She has maintained a thriving therapeutic practice for the past eleven years.  Her clients include numerous leaders in the areas of sports, business and entertainment.

Having worked as a therapist for eleven years and over  10,000 thousand hours, Mala researched and discovered what allows and motivates individuals to grow.  Because not everyone has the resources to partake in therapy, she wrote ASHES, which provides women and men a vehicle by which they may consider the events of their life and how those events effect them in present day.

The Answer to Your Prayers

answers to your prayers

Have you ever prayed for something and wished for it and worked hard to get it but it just doesn’t come? We have all been in this place where we want something so badly we can almost taste it and it’s not here. We wonder ‘why?’ and often think, “Why me?” or “Why NOT me?” It is frustrating and emotional.

We can feel angry and disappointed. There are expectations that if we envision what we want and do the work, then we should be able to have it right? That is, after all, what the law of attraction teaches us.

When you really want something and you are going after it with much attention, action and drive, it is challenging when the result doesn’t happen fast enough for you or when it doesn’t happen at all. You start to question everything including your resolve and the actions you are taking, if you are going in the right direction. It is not an easy place to be!

Read more >>> The Answer to Your Prayers.

Life Experiences – Choice – Karma – Unconditional Love – Part 3

Life Experiences - Choice - Karma - Unconditional Love - Part 3

Life Experiences – Choice – Karma – Unconditional Love – Part 3

“I am he, and he is me, and we are all together”.

Is this what the great masters and teachers such as Jesus, Buddha, and Muhammad have been implying for centuries? If so, I was beginning to understand it. The spirits fondly expressed to me that when we have real attachments to things, such as to a particular writer, poet, artist, or sculptor, and are drawn to his or her work, it is  probably because we were actually the creator of that piece of work.

Karma

If we read  something from history that profoundly teaches us, we may have been part of the  actual event. Even if we are extremely attached or moved to help someone, perhaps to support a child in a Third World country, then we are probably that  child in a different lifetime expression. Do unto others as you would do unto  yourself; the other might actually be you! Now there’s a thought.

I am  still processing this information and probably will be for several years to  come. It is amazing. The spirits have since taught me to journey to my other  lifetimes and to remember the wisdom I gained from each lifetime expression. I have also learned to journey to souls I would like to learn more about. The possibilities available through journeying are unlimited. Journeys to other  lifetimes can be extremely informative, but also lots of fun. I highly recommend  them for anyone practicing their journey skills.

We need to  understand that lifetimes are both experiences of the soul and an exchange of energy. We also need to remember that everything is energy. Lifetimes are energy, and thoughts, words, and actions are energy. Everything is energy and  everything affects and is affected by everything else. Energy used in a  directive way is power. The universe is in a constant state of motion  striving to keep energy in balance. Even if we are not consciously aware of our  energy and how it affects the whole universe, the universe is aware of it. We  are all very powerful beings.

Karma

The actions of every person on the planet  affect the lives of us all; one never does anything that is isolated from  others. We are all interconnected in a divine sphere relating, interrelating,  and exchanging energy in a holographic and profound way.

These  interrelationships are extremely complex, colouring every experience we  have. I understand that this is a difficult concept because it is so  vast, so I will describe it metaphorically: A butterfly hatches out of its cocoon 2,000 years ago. It sits in the sun in a far away country to dry its  wings. It then begins to flap its wings, moving the air around its body. That  movement of air alters the surrounding nature and the influences expand ever  outward. That continuing effect of change creates our weather patterns today!

This metaphor is, in truth, an  expression of the scientific principle of complexity. Quantum theory recognizes  the complex association of  interdependence as fundamental to reality. All of existence self-orders into a  purposeful, yet unpredictable pattern.  Science, however, “discovered” this reality long after it was known to mystics. In the study of spirituality, the manipulation of  energy is fundamental. Directing energy in a powerful way through intention can  be used for both good and evil. People can be harmed or healed through words  that carry powerful intentions.

Jan  Engels Smith –    About the Author:

Jan Engels-Smith promotes self-healing, empowerment, better communities, a  healthy world and conducts workshops in shamanism & journeying. Her book,  Becoming Yourself is at http://www.LightSong.net .  Jan’s a Licensed Counsellor. She’s done over 2,000 soul retrievals. She is the  founder of LightSong School of Shamanic Studies, a Chemical Dependency  Specialist, and Marriage Therapist. She is a water-pourer for sweat lodge, a  minister, a Reiki Master.

Alphabet Of Happiness

Alphabet Of Happiness . Accept others for who they are and for the choices they’ve made even if you have difficulty understanding their beliefs, motives, or actions.



Alphabet Of Happiness

Accept
Accept others for who they are and for the choices they’ve made even if you have difficulty understanding their beliefs, motives, or actions.

Break Away
Break away from everything that stands in the way of what you hope to accomplish with your life.

Create
Create a family of friends whom you can share your hopes, dreams, sorrows, and happiness with.

Decide
Decide that you’ll be successful and happy come what may, and good things will find you. The roadblocks are only minor obstacles along the way.

Explore
Explore and experiment. The world has much to offer, and you have much to give. And every time you try something new, you’ll learn more about yourself.

Forgive
Forgive and forget. Grudges only weigh you down and inspire unhappiness and grief. Soar above it, and remember that everyone makes mistakes.

Grow
Leave the childhood monsters behind. They can no longer hurt you or stand in your way.

Hope
Hope for the best and never forget that anything is possible as long as you remain dedicated to the task.

Ignore
Ignore the negative voice inside your head. Focus instead on your goals and remember your accomplishments. Your past success is only a small inkling of what the future holds.

Journey
Journey to new worlds, new possibilities, by remaining open-minded. Try to learn something new every day, and you’ll grow.

Know
Know that no matter how bad things seem, they’ll always get better. The warmth of spring always follows the harshest winter.

Love
Let love fill your heart instead of hate. When hate is in your heart, there’s room for nothing else, but when love is in your heart, there’s room for endless happiness.

Manage
Manage your time and your expenses wisely, and you’ll suffer less stress and worry. Then you’ll be able to focus on the important things in life.

Notice
Never ignore the poor, infirm, helpless, weak, or suffering. Offer your assistance when possible, and always your kindness and understanding.

Open
Open your eyes and take in all the beauty around you. Even during the worst of times, there’s still much to be thankful for.

Play
Never forget to have fun along the way. Success means nothing without happiness.

Question
Ask many questions, because you’re here to learn.

Relax
Refuse to let worry and stress rule your life, and remember that things always have a way of working out in the end.

Share
Share your talent, skills, knowledge, and time with others. Everything that you invest in others will return to you many times over.

Try
Even when your dreams seem impossible to reach, try anyway. You’ll be amazed by what you can accomplish.

Use
Use your gifts to your best ability. Talent that’s wasted has no value. Talent that’s used will bring unexpected rewards.

Value
Value the friends and family members who’ve supported and encouraged you, and be there for them as well.

Work
Work hard every day to be the best person you can be, but never feel guilty if you fall short of your goals. Every sunrise offers a second chance.

XRay
Look deep inside the hearts of those around you and you’ll see the goodness and beauty within.

Yield
Yield to commitment. If you stay on track and remain dedicated, you’ll find success at the end of the road.

Zoom
Zoom to a happy place when bad memories or sorrow rears its ugly head. Let nothing interfere with your goals. Instead, focus on your abilities, your dreams, and a brighter tomorrow.

Please don’t forget your~ Alphabet of Happiness

~Author Unknown ~

A certain amount of Humility.

A certain amount of humility is helpful in moving on through the stages of life. It gives us a realistic approach to interacting with other people in our lives. Sometimes competing with others or stressing ourselves to prove that we are better, can be a lot of fun and provide enjoyment and rewards.
Friendly competition with friends, when all are participating with goodwill, is entertaining.
There is a downside in trying to win or achieve more just for the sake of feeling superior to another person. The result can be a loss of much needed self-esteem in the long run.

“There is nothing noble in being superior to some other person. True nobility is being superior to your former self.” – Hindu Proverb

Accepting that we made a mistake puts it behind us, and we can then quit pretending or wishing that it hadn’t happened. We should realize that we make mistakes just as others do, and we will make more in the future. So there’s no need to be embarrassed or worried.

“A man should never be ashamed to own he has been in the wrong, which is by saying, in other words, that he is wiser today than he was yesterday.” – Alexander Pope (1688-1744)

By not acting better or more important than other people we will receive respect and friendship that is so worthwhile. Over-confidence can get us into trouble as we will appear conceited, and prospective friends will be wary. But have respect for yourself and take pride in doing good
things.

“He that falls in love with himself will have no rivals.” – Ben Franklin (1706-1790)

A good balance of humility and self-confidence is an ideal way to exist.

Spiral in the heart of love

spiral heart tree“A person should always offer a prayer of graciousnes… for the love that has awakened in them. When you feel love for your beloved and his or her for you, now and again you should offer the warmth of your love as a blessing for those who are damaged and unloved. Send that love out into the world to people who are desperate; to those who are starving; to those who are trapped in prison; in hospitals and all the terrrains of bleak and tormented lives. When you send that love out from the bountifulness of your own love, it reaches other people. This love is the deepest power of prayer.”